the twinkle in my eye

god, parenting is all over the place.

the reason i’m not finding any time to blog or wash the dishes is because i’m working four days a week acting in my team co-ordinator’s role. it’s a very diverse and busy team so there is stuff for me to do non-stop and i still need to keep my usual work ticking over plus cover the vacant position in our team. so my brain is mush when i get home at night. each week i think it will just be a couple more weeks till this acting period is over, but it’s stretching on and on. killer.

so the parenting. yesterday morning the twinkle woke at 5.30am and wouldn’t go back to sleep so when 6am (my magic line in the sand) ticked by, i got up to the crying twinkle. she screamed through breakfast. she screamed through me trying to quietly dress her, she screamed when she would normally play while i drank my coffee and read the employment section (it’s always the first part i read on saturday even though i have a job i’m perfectly happy with). poor special k’s sleep in was ruined – she got up to see if i needed support to get through the screamy morning. i finally managed to dress the twinkle and click her into the stroller and take her out for a long walk through town, stopping for coffee and searching for baby paracetamol – none to be found pre 9am in our town. i have no idea what the screaming was all about. every time we stood still yesterday there was crying and screaming. it was bloody exhausting because we were either out and about doing stuff to entertain her so she wouldn’t cry, or we were lying on the floor exhausted while she she screamed. (she hates when i lie on the floor in her room. this can trigger a tantrum.)

all the screaming is enough to make us ask – repeatedly – what is wrong with her??? most of the time i think there isn’t anything physically wrong, it’s just her personality. she’s spirited. the screaming happens a lot around here.

by bath time last night we were over it when we found ourselves in the twinkle’s bedroom with her stomping around naked except for a slightly too big pair of white shoes and a pair of black sunglasses and we finally laughed. next thing the twinkle was straddling me as i lay on the floor and she pulled out baby wipes one by one in quick succession, giving her tummy a quick wipe and reaching for the next one. we must have been deliriously tired because i laughed till i cried at this.

this morning she woke three times between 5am and 6am and i was sure we were in for the same kind of day. but miraculously she slept from 5.52am to 7.48am. 10 to 8! our kid slept till 10 to 8! special k went in and got her and she came into our room and sat in bed with us and didn’t squirm or cry or try to eat my deodorant. she smiled and chatted. it was like it was someone else’s baby. she went and had a quiet breakfast with special k while i got to drink my coffee in bed. then she came back and was utterly delightful. she spent the whole day being happy and cute, even at ike@ where we went to buy these new chairs and table:

she’s now so grown up, sitting up at the table, holding her cup with both hands to drink. she even slept on the mat in nursery 2 on friday at the baby factory. time flies!

so do you see what i mean about parenting being all over the place? i can’t pull together an interesting or coherent blog post and i feel exhausted by a small person who only spends 12 hours a day (minus naps) up and about in our lives. i really have nothing to complain about.

oh, and tonight the twinkle said “cack cack” and “duh” when she was playing with her rubber duckie in the bath.

and then when we put her to bed she playing peek-a-boo with her blankie as she lay there when we said goodnight to her, then she closed her eyes and feel asleep. this is how we imagined parenting would always be! oh so naive, we were.